Tag Archives: applewatch

June 9, 2015

The Oatmeal on Apple Watch

Every day, the Apple Watch and I go to war over my “standing goal.” I get achievements for not lying down. Or not sitting down. I get rewarded for standing up, I think. I can’t really tell. It says my standing goal is 12 hours a day, which doesn’t make sense because that seems like an awful lot of standing, so I think it’s just rewarding me for not being dead. I get rewarded for walking to the fridge. I get rewarded for having a pulse. My dog likes to defecate in my tomato garden, which I deal with by shoveling his dried turds over the fence and into my neighbor’s hot tub. I even get rewarded for that. I get rewarded for my airborne caca missiles. Achievement unlocked. Thanks, Apple. You’re the best. Caca missiles are the best. I am never taking this fucking watch off.

Some salient points amongst the humour.

April 27, 2015

The promise—and massive challenge—of making games for the Apple Watch

If you’re trying to create a traditional animated sequence for your Apple Watch game, you might also have some trouble. “Normally when you program a game, you do everything algorithmically for moving everything,” Eyes Wide Games’ Griffin explained. “[Here] you have to pre-render everything. You can still do interesting animations, but instead of at run-time dynamically figuring out where you want things to move, you have to organize your game experience to where you already know what all the possible moves are and render them out.”

Companion apps seem like to way to go, at least until a) the SDK is updated or b) Apple Watch apps are allowed to run directly from the device. I’m not holding my breath for the latter to happen any time soon.

September 10, 2014

Apple announces Apple Watch

Looks beautiful and very functional. But given that they danced around the issue of battery life, I suspect this will need charging at least once a day. For me, that’s a dealbreaker.